In case you’re wondering how smart rats can be, and if Ratatouille is real, then allow me to share this story: I once had two rats, River and Chell, both rescued from a laboratory as babies. Chell was whip-smart and liked to ride around on my shoulders as I walked around the apartment. She would recognize places she wanted to go, such as her cage or the sofa, and I would raise my arm up to let her run across to her objective. She quickly cottoned on to this and, in an entirely self-taught behavior, would run to one of my shoulders or another and tug on my sleeve, to signal me to raise my arm in the direction she wanted. In this manner she was able to steer me around the apartment and would frequently use me as a taxi instead of walking herself. She then taught her sister how to do it too.
Biological Confusion
Test Tube: Hey, can I ask you a question?
OJ: Sure thing, lay it on me.
Test Tube: I’ve been having this problem, and none of my medical books say anything about it that makes sense.
OJ: Oh?
Test Tube: So sometimes, sparked by… something… I get this weird pounding in my chest and my vision goes white, and… it sounds painful but it’s super amazing.
OJ: What the fuck? What causes it?
Soap: *walking past* Hi guys… Hi, Test Tube. *walks off*
Test Tube: There it goes again!
OJ: Ohh, I see the problem now.
Test Tube: What is it?
OJ: You’re gay.












